OK, he's not asking which holidays you HATE, just which ones make you act like a douche. I think most holidays are stupid, but the only ones where I start acting like a douchenozzle are Christmas, Valentine's Day, and Sweetest Day ("Other" in the poll). Here's why:
Christmas--F'ing long-ass lines in the stores; children being more whiny, brattty, douchy and generally unlikeable than they normally are; every place you go is crowded with sweaty, angry people who are even douchier than me; the worst music in the history of the world; drunkenness, bad tempers, and general stupidity increase by about 5000%, and what is the end result? Post-holiday depression and suicide, more f'ing long-ass lines as people return **** they don't like, skyrocketing credit card debt, and an overall feeling, by the entire human race, that at last another Christmas is over and done and we can all get back to normal.
I like the decorations, giving presents, and having dinner with friends. Everything else sucks.
Valentine's Day--I dislike anything that is overly sappy and sentimental and covered with lace and ribbons and pink, frilly stuff. Enough with the ridiculous Cupid babies and pink, frou-frou hearts, just give me the freakin' chocolates! The chocolates, give me them! You don't need a special day for that! This holiday exists solely to play on the guilt factor of people who barely do **** for their spouses/significant others/whatever the rest of the year, so they go out and buy some roses and a candy-filled box to make up for their inadequacies. Its initials are VD, for Venereal Disease, which is what a lot of people undoubtedly get after shacking up with someone who plied them with candy-filled boxes and cheap roses.
Sweetest Day--If you don't live in the northeastern United States, you have probably never heard of this extremely stupid holiday, which exists solely to play on the guilt factor of people who barely do **** for their spouses/significant others/whatever the rest of the year, so they go out and buy some roses and a candy-filled box to make up for their inadequacies. In other words, IT'S AN EXACT REPLICA OF VALENTINE'S DAY!! However, unlike VDay, which at least has a long history behind it based on ancient pagan practices--and has only recently been converted into the candy-and-flowers sales extravaganza that it is today--Sweetest Day was formed by a committee of candy makers in 1921 in Cleveland, Ohio for no other reason than to promote candy sales. It's a holiday...that was formed by a
committee! In
Cleveland! To promote
candy sales! As if we Americans--already bloated to critical mass by the non-stop consumption of sugar-filled garbage--need a holiday expressly to encourage us to eat more! GAWD, what a dumb holiday.
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Posted 02 October 2009 - 09:59 AM
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Posted 02 October 2009 - 02:41 PM
Would you like V-Day if there was a Valentine's Day pie?
Did you go back in time and change the day you first dated or something?
Especially since it will be summer there - it's so win-win!
as if they weren't scary enough!
Posted 03 October 2009 - 07:03 AM
