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Now I will not take credit for this, I was looking around the internet awhile ago and i read on a forum about this so i wish i could site it but i can't find it and i dont want to link to any other forum....
What it said was basically that noah's ark was completely impossible the way it was told in the bible.
1. First the whole "two of every animal male and female". How could that be possible, not only is it a pain to gather up EVERY animal, but two of each sex. What comes from this is, how is that possible? How long would it take a group of 100 people today to do that? He was one man.
a. now lets say that the animals just mystically all came on there own. How did he feed them. How did he know what animals were coming and what they ate. I read something about not being able to eat animal flesh back then so what would noah do for the animals that ate flesh. Where did he get all this food from
b. What happened if noah missed some animals, they must be extinct now. maybe some of the animals died upon the ark and now are gone completely.
c. did he bring every breed of every species. so he brought every type of every animal....wow he is good.
2.The biggest, best ship today cant even hold the weight that noahs ark must have had. It was a wooden ship carring, who knows how much weight. All the supplies, the food for not only him and his family...but for the animals, and of course the creatures themselves. look how much an elephant wieghs...imagine there was two of them, and that just 1 creature. there are still many heavy wieghts, and also the different breeds of elephant. there have had to been more than just two.
a. all in all that ship as described in the bible could not possiblily hold that. Even today we could its difficult to make something that could do what noah's ark has done.
ok no more, my hands are tired and i want to go to taco bell, if anyone wants to continue "bashing" noah be my guest.
MAN I AM HUNGRY!!!
Noah's Ark......not possible
#1
Posted 20 February 2006 - 03:36 PM
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Don't do those naughty things.
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#2
Posted 20 February 2006 - 03:53 PM
- rogue scholar
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Add to the questions about the animals...
How did the kangaroos get back to Australia when the flood was over? Did they swim? How did they reach the Middle East in the first place?
How did the kangaroos get back to Australia when the flood was over? Did they swim? How did they reach the Middle East in the first place?
"I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death." -- George Carlin
#3
Posted 20 February 2006 - 04:00 PM
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They hopped, obviously. Silly Cannoli.
"...Cuckoo got it right..." - James Madison
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"I agree" - Quetzalcoatl
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#5
Posted 20 February 2006 - 04:11 PM
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Oh the irony...."they said it couldn't be done".
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Educate your Mind, and then Realise your Spirit. I am, I think, I feel, I act, and I own.
Furnish your House, Nourish your Body, Cleanse your Soul,
Educate your Mind, and then Realise your Spirit. I am, I think, I feel, I act, and I own.
#6
Posted 20 February 2006 - 04:19 PM
- rogue scholar
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Quote
Cuckoo:
They hopped, obviously. Silly Cannoli.
They hopped, obviously. Silly Cannoli.
"I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death." -- George Carlin
#7
Posted 20 February 2006 - 04:19 PM
- Accountz Payabo
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Oooh there's probably a mystical, dumb answer here. I wonder what mystical, dumb poster could help us?! Maybe he's already posted something vague in this very thread! to try to help enlighten us. Please help us Darken Ish... I mean dumb mystic, help us understand!
Tsquare: Because many people are…they believe what they believe and are blind to anything that challenges it.
Me: You don't think that defines you?
Tsquare: What part of “I’m a REPUBLICAN!” don’t you understand?
Me: You don't think that defines you?
Tsquare: What part of “I’m a REPUBLICAN!” don’t you understand?
#8
Posted 20 February 2006 - 04:34 PM
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where did noah actually end up when the flood was over...and how did he know where to put all these animals? how did he know they would be able to survive in these environments? how did he know that some penguins would be best suited in antartica and some would be better in warm weather? HOW THE HELL DID HE GET PENGUINS? i know they can live in water but they can only be under for so long...they got to sleep and they sleep on land.
What kind of water flooded the earth anyways fresh or salt? cause some can only survive in salt some in fresh.
What kind of water flooded the earth anyways fresh or salt? cause some can only survive in salt some in fresh.
Don't do those naughty things.
#9
Posted 20 February 2006 - 04:52 PM
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quote:
2.The biggest, best ship today cant even hold the weight that noahs ark must have had. It was a wooden ship carring, who knows how much weight. All the supplies, the food for not only him and his family...but for the animals, and of course the creatures themselves. look how much an elephant wieghs...imagine there was two of them, and that just 1 creature. there are still many heavy wieghts, and also the different breeds of elephant. there have had to been more than just two.
Actually, the word "embryos" (which translates to the english word "embryo") is used richly through the original Greek text, and is edited out in Noah's account because the church could not properly translate it to anything meaningful. Now, in the age of technology, we have meaning to this word, and see that possibly what was meant in the original texts was that Noah simply took a ton of embryos on the ark? 2.The biggest, best ship today cant even hold the weight that noahs ark must have had. It was a wooden ship carring, who knows how much weight. All the supplies, the food for not only him and his family...but for the animals, and of course the creatures themselves. look how much an elephant wieghs...imagine there was two of them, and that just 1 creature. there are still many heavy wieghts, and also the different breeds of elephant. there have had to been more than just two.
I also have some ideas that may lend to the theory that Jesus actually knew quantum physics, or a redimentary, qualitative version of it...
#10
Posted 20 February 2006 - 05:15 PM
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omg, now noah was a scientist who could handle the embryos of all these animals without them being destroyed....that is pure crap.
Don't do those naughty things.
#11
Posted 20 February 2006 - 05:19 PM
- A Goddamn Sexual Tyrannosaur
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This thread is hilarious!
Hagalina Magalina Hoopensteiner Walkensteiner Hogan Logan Wogan was her name.
#12
Posted 20 February 2006 - 05:40 PM
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i agree with that.....jesus new quantum physics. what did he study this between miracles, after he was done walking on water he sat down by the fire and cracked open the old quantum physics book.
the bible describes that the animals were...like....ALIVE and kicking.
the bible describes that the animals were...like....ALIVE and kicking.
Don't do those naughty things.
#13
Posted 20 February 2006 - 06:14 PM
- Calmer than you are
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the kangaroos rode on the backs of the sea dinosaurs.
Polar has it right. Ark=science lab from Jurassic Park. The mass extention that occured was cuz Noah lost all the embryos to those species. Idiots.
Polar has it right. Ark=science lab from Jurassic Park. The mass extention that occured was cuz Noah lost all the embryos to those species. Idiots.
People gang up on me because in a discussion I outwit them; and when it comes to my personal life, they're jealous of me.
-Red 5
"It's all the Democrats’ fault! Or it's all the Republicans' fault–I'm not sure. What we know for certain, according to everything I've heard, is that it's entirely the fault of one of them or the other and certainly not due to any combination of the two."
- The Onion
-Red 5
"It's all the Democrats’ fault! Or it's all the Republicans' fault–I'm not sure. What we know for certain, according to everything I've heard, is that it's entirely the fault of one of them or the other and certainly not due to any combination of the two."
- The Onion
#14
Posted 20 February 2006 - 06:20 PM
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that bastard
Don't do those naughty things.
#15
Posted 20 February 2006 - 06:52 PM
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Quote
Lucas:
Oooh there's probably a mystical, dumb answer here. I wonder what mystical, dumb poster could help us?! Maybe he's already posted something vague in this very thread! to try to help enlighten us. Please help us Darken Ish... I mean dumb mystic, help us understand!
Oooh there's probably a mystical, dumb answer here. I wonder what mystical, dumb poster could help us?! Maybe he's already posted something vague in this very thread! to try to help enlighten us. Please help us Darken Ish... I mean dumb mystic, help us understand!
Even bad dogs deserve a dry bone.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Furnish your House, Nourish your Body, Cleanse your Soul,
Educate your Mind, and then Realise your Spirit. I am, I think, I feel, I act, and I own.
Furnish your House, Nourish your Body, Cleanse your Soul,
Educate your Mind, and then Realise your Spirit. I am, I think, I feel, I act, and I own.
#16
Posted 20 February 2006 - 07:25 PM
- an easy kill
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what the **** are you talking about
#17
Posted 20 February 2006 - 07:58 PM
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^ I didn't catch everything Darken Ishvar said, but it was something about wanting to be banned for life.
I'm with Ness, Thread of the month!
I'm with Ness, Thread of the month!
Some quotes are funny: "A sandwich takes maybe two minutes to assemble -- three if you can't find a clean knife, four at worst if you're stricken with carpal tunnel." ~ NumberSix
Some quotes are profound: "I agree with what I said before." ~ Mara Jade Skywalker
And some quotes make you wonder what in the **** you just read: "look, we know we shag wee boys, but the beatles are ok now so it's cool." ~ Boba Sweat
Ender's reaction to every movie ever made except for The Big Lebowski: "This movie sucked."
Some quotes are profound: "I agree with what I said before." ~ Mara Jade Skywalker
And some quotes make you wonder what in the **** you just read: "look, we know we shag wee boys, but the beatles are ok now so it's cool." ~ Boba Sweat
Ender's reaction to every movie ever made except for The Big Lebowski: "This movie sucked."
#18
Posted 20 February 2006 - 08:06 PM
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There were no dogs, they came later.
Some humans devolved to dogs, but it's just a theory.
Some humans devolved to dogs, but it's just a theory.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Furnish your House, Nourish your Body, Cleanse your Soul,
Educate your Mind, and then Realise your Spirit. I am, I think, I feel, I act, and I own.
Furnish your House, Nourish your Body, Cleanse your Soul,
Educate your Mind, and then Realise your Spirit. I am, I think, I feel, I act, and I own.
#19
Posted 20 February 2006 - 08:41 PM
- Accountz Payabo
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Okay you ****ing crackhead. Get the **** outta here.
Tsquare: Because many people are…they believe what they believe and are blind to anything that challenges it.
Me: You don't think that defines you?
Tsquare: What part of “I’m a REPUBLICAN!” don’t you understand?
Me: You don't think that defines you?
Tsquare: What part of “I’m a REPUBLICAN!” don’t you understand?
#20
Posted 20 February 2006 - 09:22 PM
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Quote
the_one:
met....a....phor
met....a....phor
Oh, what's the point...
#21
Posted 20 February 2006 - 09:26 PM
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Lucas loco.
You have nothing to contribute? devolve,,,go back to the ocean.
Some people here actually like to disccuss themes, and not play high-school power games.
Principal!!!!
You have nothing to contribute? devolve,,,go back to the ocean.
Some people here actually like to disccuss themes, and not play high-school power games.
Principal!!!!
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Furnish your House, Nourish your Body, Cleanse your Soul,
Educate your Mind, and then Realise your Spirit. I am, I think, I feel, I act, and I own.
Furnish your House, Nourish your Body, Cleanse your Soul,
Educate your Mind, and then Realise your Spirit. I am, I think, I feel, I act, and I own.
#22
Posted 20 February 2006 - 09:49 PM
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A critical work on the Scientific evidence of Noah's Ark is The Discovery of Noah's Ark By David Fasold.
#23
Posted 20 February 2006 - 10:53 PM
- Calmer than you are
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Quote
chesterdoodle:
A critical work on the Scientific evidence of Noah's Ark is The Discovery of Noah's Ark By David Fasold.
A critical work on the Scientific evidence of Noah's Ark is The Discovery of Noah's Ark By David Fasold.
DI...I mean this with all respect. Are you mentally ill? You sound like someone that is about to commit suicide or go off the deep end. Do we need to call the paramedics?
People gang up on me because in a discussion I outwit them; and when it comes to my personal life, they're jealous of me.
-Red 5
"It's all the Democrats’ fault! Or it's all the Republicans' fault–I'm not sure. What we know for certain, according to everything I've heard, is that it's entirely the fault of one of them or the other and certainly not due to any combination of the two."
- The Onion
-Red 5
"It's all the Democrats’ fault! Or it's all the Republicans' fault–I'm not sure. What we know for certain, according to everything I've heard, is that it's entirely the fault of one of them or the other and certainly not due to any combination of the two."
- The Onion
#24
Posted 20 February 2006 - 11:13 PM
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Ender: tell me a kind way to respond to this:Okay you ****ing crackhead. Get the **** outta here.
You...did notice?
You...did notice?
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Furnish your House, Nourish your Body, Cleanse your Soul,
Educate your Mind, and then Realise your Spirit. I am, I think, I feel, I act, and I own.
Furnish your House, Nourish your Body, Cleanse your Soul,
Educate your Mind, and then Realise your Spirit. I am, I think, I feel, I act, and I own.
#25
Posted 20 February 2006 - 11:25 PM
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Quote
Ender:
Polar has it right. Ark=science lab from Jurassic.
Polar has it right. Ark=science lab from Jurassic.
#26
Posted 20 February 2006 - 11:29 PM
- Calmer than you are
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Quote
Darken Ishvar:
Ender: tell me a kind way to respond to this:Okay you ****ing crackhead. Get the **** outta here.
You...did notice?
Ender: tell me a kind way to respond to this:Okay you ****ing crackhead. Get the **** outta here.
You...did notice?
I am absolutly serious. I have no idea what you are trying to communicate.
Do you need help? Do you need to talk? My AIM is skiender.
People gang up on me because in a discussion I outwit them; and when it comes to my personal life, they're jealous of me.
-Red 5
"It's all the Democrats’ fault! Or it's all the Republicans' fault–I'm not sure. What we know for certain, according to everything I've heard, is that it's entirely the fault of one of them or the other and certainly not due to any combination of the two."
- The Onion
-Red 5
"It's all the Democrats’ fault! Or it's all the Republicans' fault–I'm not sure. What we know for certain, according to everything I've heard, is that it's entirely the fault of one of them or the other and certainly not due to any combination of the two."
- The Onion
#27
Posted 20 February 2006 - 11:50 PM
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Quote
Lucas:
Okay you ****ing crackhead. Get the **** outta here.
Okay you ****ing crackhead. Get the **** outta here.
Maybe you didn't read it.
Does Lucas have license to rant innanities?
-------------------------------------------------------------------
Furnish your House, Nourish your Body, Cleanse your Soul,
Educate your Mind, and then Realise your Spirit. I am, I think, I feel, I act, and I own.
Furnish your House, Nourish your Body, Cleanse your Soul,
Educate your Mind, and then Realise your Spirit. I am, I think, I feel, I act, and I own.
#28
Posted 21 February 2006 - 01:15 AM
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A plausible explanation will be that Noah was an extraterrestrial lifeform. An ark that was massive, but still small enough to hold all species in the WORLD, will be an alien ship capable of handling DNA/embryos.
Of course, the ancients, being the stupid ****s that they were, saw the alien as a special human and gave him a name, Noah, and his spaceship was seen as an ark.
Of course, the ancients, being the stupid ****s that they were, saw the alien as a special human and gave him a name, Noah, and his spaceship was seen as an ark.
"But what if my 12 year old self had commited a murder? They'd rush to say I was old enough and deserved to be treated as an adult, but why would I get responsiblity now? Why is a child responsible enough to kill but not enough to have sex? But when I bring up this topic in real life I am looked at even more like a little girl." -- Fairy, on the issue of child sexuality
#29
Posted 21 February 2006 - 03:36 AM
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This thread is beginning to become too much fun laugh
#30
Posted 21 February 2006 - 07:27 AM
- A Goddamn Sexual Tyrannosaur
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Quote
RavEMasteR:
A plausible explanation will be that Noah was an extraterrestrial lifeform. An ark that was massive, but still small enough to hold all species in the WORLD, will be an alien ship capable of handling DNA/embryos.
Of course, the ancients, being the stupid ****s that they were, saw the alien as a special human and gave him a name, Noah, and his spaceship was seen as an ark.
A plausible explanation will be that Noah was an extraterrestrial lifeform. An ark that was massive, but still small enough to hold all species in the WORLD, will be an alien ship capable of handling DNA/embryos.
Of course, the ancients, being the stupid ****s that they were, saw the alien as a special human and gave him a name, Noah, and his spaceship was seen as an ark.
Hagalina Magalina Hoopensteiner Walkensteiner Hogan Logan Wogan was her name.
#31
Posted 21 February 2006 - 08:48 AM
- scrumtralescent
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The Ancients? Someone's been watching SG-1!
As long as I'm fighting, I'm not dying.
#32
Posted 21 February 2006 - 09:06 AM
- Calmer than you are
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Ness...love your avatar...TBL is my favorite movie!
People gang up on me because in a discussion I outwit them; and when it comes to my personal life, they're jealous of me.
-Red 5
"It's all the Democrats’ fault! Or it's all the Republicans' fault–I'm not sure. What we know for certain, according to everything I've heard, is that it's entirely the fault of one of them or the other and certainly not due to any combination of the two."
- The Onion
-Red 5
"It's all the Democrats’ fault! Or it's all the Republicans' fault–I'm not sure. What we know for certain, according to everything I've heard, is that it's entirely the fault of one of them or the other and certainly not due to any combination of the two."
- The Onion
#33
Posted 21 February 2006 - 09:07 AM
- A Goddamn Sexual Tyrannosaur
- Posts: 5,589
- Joined: 25 Jun 2001
wooo
Hagalina Magalina Hoopensteiner Walkensteiner Hogan Logan Wogan was her name.
#34
Posted 21 February 2006 - 10:56 AM
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ok so noah was an alien now? Carrying embryos to earth to fill it with lovely animals.....sad.
I guess that could go with the theory that we are only an expirement for some greater life form to abserve.
Feel the hate!!!!
I guess that could go with the theory that we are only an expirement for some greater life form to abserve.
Feel the hate!!!!
Don't do those naughty things.
#35
Posted 21 February 2006 - 10:58 AM
- Advad Disagerer
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How did he transport the jellyfish, huh???
August 18, 2008 7:16 AM
"when my posts are read with sematics they aren't always going to make sense."
~Stallion
*************************************
June 28, 2004 08:14 PM
"In my opinion it is a fact."
~Darth Simpson
"when my posts are read with sematics they aren't always going to make sense."
~Stallion
*************************************
June 28, 2004 08:14 PM
"In my opinion it is a fact."
~Darth Simpson
#36
Posted 21 February 2006 - 11:03 AM
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in the ark or the spaceship version? at this moment you have to be a little more specific. if the spaceship...i guess they were embryos but he wouldn't have carried them on the ark cause they lived in the water...which is why i asked what kind of water covered the earth...salt or fresh.
Don't do those naughty things.
#37
Posted 21 February 2006 - 01:52 PM
- A Goddamn Sexual Tyrannosaur
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It would have to be salt. Which means there had to be catfish and trout and bass in the arc, which means he needed some sort of water tight compartment on the ship. Now we're getting somewhere people.
Find me someone who made biblical freshwater aquariums, and I'll find you your precious Arc.
Find me someone who made biblical freshwater aquariums, and I'll find you your precious Arc.
Hagalina Magalina Hoopensteiner Walkensteiner Hogan Logan Wogan was her name.
#38
Posted 21 February 2006 - 02:48 PM
- Be Mad. It Helps.
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Good thing that the worlds largest animal already lives in water so Noah was spared that grief when the flood came.
No one possesses skills greater than the Master of Sinanju.
#39
Posted 21 February 2006 - 04:30 PM
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so if it all was salt water then he also had to make that aquarium filled with fresh water and every fish that couldn't survive in salt water.
Now how the hell did he manage that one? male and female of every fresh water fish?
Now how the hell did he manage that one? male and female of every fresh water fish?
Don't do those naughty things.
#40
Posted 21 February 2006 - 05:19 PM
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Quote
Mara Jade Skywalker:
The Ancients? Someone's been watching SG-1!
The Ancients? Someone's been watching SG-1!
Quote
Mara Jade Skywalker:
ok so noah was an alien now? Carrying embryos to earth to fill it with lovely animals.....sad.
I guess that could go with the theory that we are only an expirement for some greater life form to abserve.
Feel the hate!!!!
ok so noah was an alien now? Carrying embryos to earth to fill it with lovely animals.....sad.
I guess that could go with the theory that we are only an expirement for some greater life form to abserve.
Feel the hate!!!!
Again, you're not giving any evidence as to why it is "sad", just like you've done in...90% of all your other threads?
"But what if my 12 year old self had commited a murder? They'd rush to say I was old enough and deserved to be treated as an adult, but why would I get responsiblity now? Why is a child responsible enough to kill but not enough to have sex? But when I bring up this topic in real life I am looked at even more like a little girl." -- Fairy, on the issue of child sexuality
